You can't really consider yourself fit if you suck at pull-Ups. That's just the way it is.
Think of the fittest, baddest looking sumbitches at your gym: do they bang out sets of 10 or more lat-stretching pull-Ups, often with a couple chalk-dusted plates chained to their waist? Or do they struggle to perform even just one anemic rep before sulking over to the assisted chin machine?
I suspect that if it's the latter, your opinion of their overall badassery would quickly diminish.
Those of you that suck at pull-Ups today have likely sucked since birth, and can likely recall the humiliation you experienced during pull-Up day in gym class, when all you could do was hang from the bar and twitch spastically for a few awkward seconds before falling to the floor in a shameful, tear-stained heap.
To alleviate that problem for future generations, most schools have since removed the pull-Up from their Physical Education programs, replacing it with the flexed-arm hang, plank variations, or calculator races – or simply removed PE class altogether.
Thank God they ditched the pull-Up. It's important that we teach the leaders of tomorrow that when presented with a seemingly insurmountable challenge, you need only to cry to your parents about how unfair life is, so said challenge can be reduced, removed, or replaced with something else that doesn't have callous-building potential.
Besides, it's not like anyone will ever need to pull him or herself up in real life, right?
End that rant.
Before I get to the meat of this article, I'd be remiss if I didn't address the 800-pound gorilla in the room (no, not your mother-in-law) – a HUGE component to any pull-Up challenge is total bodyweight.
Regardless if you're 300 pounds of donuts and Kashi or 300 pounds of striated muscle, all that extra weight is going to make performing the pull-Up more challenging.
Obviously, dropping body fat never fails to drive pull-Up numbers sharply – so if your V-shape looks more like a big 'O' and you want to bang out pull-Ups like a seasoned Marine, it would be a wise move to first drop some chunk. I doubt few lifters would argue with that statement.
But it's the other side of the bodyweight argument that really ticks me off. If I have to hear that weak sauce cop-out, "It's because I'm so big and muscular that I can't do pull-Ups to save my life," I might just blow a gasket. You're pissing on my leg and trying to convince me it's raining. It's not working.
Check out the video of Konstantinovs, a powerlifter, doing about 55 pull-Ups with fairly decent form – at a bodyweight of nearly 275-pounds.
Despite being a freak, Konstantinovs is definitely not alone. I can think of dozens of big, jacked guys that can bang out Pull-Ups with abandon, as well as dudes in the 180-220 pound range that can kill it with an extra 50-100 pounds strapped to their waist.
So your excuse, big guy, is no excuse at all.
When you can't do any pull-Ups at all, you likely have more issues than Windows ME but fear not, we can still make progress.
The first problem area is strength, or lack thereof. You don't have the necessary strength to pull your own bodyweight up, so it's obvious that you need to get stronger.
The primary muscles working in the pull-Up are the lats, biceps, and rear deltoids, with numerous synergists including the forearm flexors, elbow flexors, rhomboids, teres major, external rotators, and trapezius; even the core and legs, to a lesser degree.
Of course, one of the best ways to strengthen these muscles is to do pull-Ups, but obviously that isn't one of your options. Other exercises we'll be focusing on are 45-degree bent over rows, dumbbell rows, lat pulldowns, and then some specific pull-Up related exercises.
I like the lat pulldown as a gauge of pull-Up strength potential. The general guideline I use is if you can lat pulldown 75% of your bodyweight or more for 1 rep, then you're close to being able to do one real pull-Up.
As with all lifts that involve some skill, the technique on a pull-Up is important. (Here is a demo of a strict pull-Up.)
Most people know the basics, but the key to mastering pull-Ups (or just to stop sucking at them) is to learn how to kip properly.
A kip is when you use some other muscles and momentum to perform the pull-Up. I can picture the CrossFit-phobes snorting into their protein shakes when I mention the kip, but first you have to realize that there are two types of kips: conditioning kips and controlled kips.
Conditioning kips are when all you care about is getting the chin up over the bar at all costs – and to accomplish this you use every ounce of lower body momentum at your disposal. That's definitely not what I'm talking about.
A controlled kip is a relatively subtle movement that involves some power generation in the legs and hips, where that power is then transferred to the upper body.
Make no mistake, it definitely makes the exercise easier, but if you can't do any strict pull-Ups at all (or hardly any), it's best to use the controlled kipping variety, at least for the time being.
In a few months you'll be able to perform strict, clean pull-Ups thanks to the strength built from performing controlled kip pull-Ups.
A good kip is a little hard to explain (see video below) and when you're first learning the technique it'll feel a bit exaggerated. Once you get more proficient, your kip will become more subtle.
When I'm ready to do pull-Ups, I usually bend my knees a bit, cross one leg over the other, and then go.
So when you do it right and feel yourself shoot up to the bar, try to remember that and duplicate it every rep.
A method of progression is to just hold one leg instead of both. Your partner doesn't need to be very strong to do this unless you're very heavy.
This is one of the best ways to learn how to do a pull-Up.
Please note that the assisted pull-Up machine (where you stand on a platform and pull yourself up) is near useless for learning how to do pull-Ups, so do NOT perform that exercise.
Before I present you with a few strategies to get you on the road to pull-Up success, we first need to determine what category of pull-Up suckery best describes you:
To be fair, you probably don't suck at pull-Ups if you can do more than 5 with good form – and if you're a female, that's actually pretty good – but you can still get better.
No matter what degree of "suckitude" you currently fall in, this program has what you need to get your chubby chin over the bar. Once you can move into the next category (i.e., you go from doing 2 pull-Ups to 6), you can then begin following the prescribed training protocol for that new strength level you've achieved.
In two to three months, you should see a significant difference in your pull-Up strength, not to mention your back and upper arm musculature.
Granted, it may not erase all those painful memories of crying in the corner of the school gym, but at least you'll sleep soundly knowing that the dreaded "you suck" stigma is a thing of the past.
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